20
2改变
作者： F. 斯科特 · 费兹杰拉德
编译：嘉炜
我应该像书中所说的那样，做一些理所当然的，道德高尚而正确的决定，因为她前面对坎比的行为确实让人瞧不起。事实相反，艾莉仍然只需要对我动一动手指，我就会马上出现在她面前。
几天后，她略带伤感的跟我说:“我知道你一定认为我很糟糕，就像我有时也觉得自己糟糕一样。但这次真的只是一个令人震惊的巧合而已。”
二十三岁的时候，我还在迷茫之中，对所有的事物都失去了信念，只知道有些人强大而意志坚定，很有魅力，可以为所欲为，而有些人却被现实捉弄得很狼狈。我希望我自己是前者，我也确信艾莉一定是前者。
我不得不改变一些对她的其他看法。在和一个女孩长时间地讨论接吻的问题时——那时候人们谈论接吻比实际上的接吻要多得多——我提到，艾莉只吻过两三个男人，而且是在她认为自己恋爱了的时候。令我相当迷惑不安的是，那个女孩笑得差点滚到地上。
“我说的这是真的。”我向她保证，但突然自己也意识到事实可能并非如此，于是还是强作镇定的说，“她亲口告诉我的。”
“艾莉·卡尔霍恩！oh，我的天！怎么，我差点忘了去年在科技部的春季派对上的事——”
这是在九月。当时我们随时都可能出国，为了使我们的兵力尽可能的增强，第四训练营的最后一批军官也成功抵达了。第四个阵营与前三个阵营不同——候选人来自普通士兵；有些甚至是征兵师。他们的名字很奇怪，没有元音，除了少数年轻的民兵，你几乎可以当然地认定他们是毫无背景的。我们连队的新成员是来自马萨诸塞州新贝德福德的厄尔·舍恩中尉，他是我见过的最标志的身材，因为他身高一米九，黑头发，肤色鲜亮，深棕色的眼睛炯炯有神。他不是很聪明，而且没有受过教育，几乎是文盲，但他是一个优秀的军官，他脾气暴躁，指挥能力强，在军队的名利场如鱼得水。我把他的傲慢性格也归结于他的出身，他来自一个叫新贝德福德的乡村小镇。
我们被安排在一起，因此他住进了我的住所。不到一个星期，一张塔尔顿闻名的姑娘的照片，就被粗暴地钉在同住屋内的墙上。
“她绝非一个普通女孩儿。她是个名副其实的交际花，与这儿的名流们几乎都有来往。”
Of course I should have made one of those fine moral decisions that people make in books, and despised her. On the contrary, I don't doubt that she could still have had me by raising her hand.
A few days later she made it all right by saying wistfully, "I know you think it was terrible of me to think of myself at a time like that, but it was such a shocking coincidence."
At twenty-three I was entirely unconvinced about anything, except that some people were strong and attractive and could do what they wanted, and others were caught and disgraced. I hoped I was of the former. I was sure Ailie was.
I had to revise other ideas about her. In the course of a long discussion with some girl about kissing--in those days people still talked about kissing more than they kissed--I mentioned the fact that Ailie had only kissed two or three men, and only when she thought she was in love. To my considerable disconcertion the girl figuratively just lay on the floor and howled.
"But it's true," I assured her, suddenly knowing it wasn't. "She told me herself."
"Ailie Calhoun! Oh, my heavens! Why, last year at the Tech spring house party--"
This was in September. We were going over-seas any week now, and to bring us up to full strength a last batch of officers from the fourth training camp arrived. The fourth camp wasn't like the first three--the candidates were from the ranks; even from the drafted divisions. They had queer names without vowels in them, and save for a few young militiamen, you couldn't take it for granted that they came out of any background at all. The addition to our company was Lieutenant Earl Schoen from New Bedford, Massachusetts; as fine a physical specimen as I have ever seen. He was six-foot-three, with black hair, high color and glossy dark-brown eyes. He wasn't very smart and he was definitely illiterate, yet he was a good officer, high-tempered and commanding, and with that becoming touch of vanity that sits well on the military. I had an idea that New Bedford was a country town, and set down his bumptious qualities to that.
We were doubled up in living quarters and he came into my hut. Inside of a week there was a cabinet photograph of some Tarleton girl nailed brutally to the shack wall.
"She's no jane or anything like that. She's a society girl; goes with all the best people here."
