Do you really know｜什么是“罗密欧与朱丽叶效应”？

What is the Romeo and Juliet effect?

When someone tells you not to do something, it often becomes even more tempting, which is why as a teenager when your parents forbade you from seeing a certain boyfriend or girlfriend, you felt even more passionate about them. Now psychologists have looked into what causes the so-called Romeo and Juliet effect.

Why is it called this?

Psychologists at the University of Colorado chose the name of Shakespeare's play following an experiment which was conducted in 1972. In the 16th century play, the two protagonists fall in love despite coming from different sides of feuding families.

The researchers interviewed 140 couples and found that parental interference may intensify the feelings of romantic love between some couples, at least for a brief span of time.

The researchers attribute this to the theory of reactance, in other words, how people react when they feel their freedom of choice is threatened or reduced. According to the theory, people experience an unpleasant motivational state called reactance, which makes them resist the source of the threat and try to restore their freedom.

Although later studies have shown the opposite, the success of a relationship is often dependent on the approval of the couple's family and close friends. This is known as the social network effect.

So does family approval make or break love?

Well, it's not an exact science. It depends on the person. According to a 2015 study by the University of Mississippi, there are different types of reactants.

Defiant reactants. This refers to people who tend to do the opposite of what they are told. If they're told to speak less loudly, they'll shout.

And independent reactants. People who tend to make their own choices without worrying too much about what they're told to do. These people will choose to speak less loudly or not at all, depending on what seems appropriate to them.

In terms of relationships, a defiant person will continue their romance in secret, while an independent person will decide whether or not to continue the relationship according to their own criteria.

The balance between the Romeo and Juliet effect and the social network effect varies from one individual to another, but also from one culture to another. Regardless, like Romeo and Juliet, it's hard to keep a relationship going if everyone around you is opposed to it.

And does the Romeo and Juliet effect only happen when families get in the way of love?

The phenomenon of becoming more attached to someone unattainable may result from our childhood experiences. Perhaps love was withheld or we only received cold or distant signs of affection.

Or it could be from the dopamine rush we get when we're in love. Dopamine is a chemical that makes us happy and motivated. It keeps us hooked on the same person and prevents us from moving on. There you have it.

词汇表
tempting [ˈtemptɪŋ] adj. 诱人的，吸引人的
Romeo and Juliet effect 罗密欧与朱丽叶效应（指外界干涉反而加深恋人感情的逆反心理现象）
protagonist [prəˈtæɡənɪst] n. 主角，主人公
feuding family [ˈfjuːdɪŋ] 世仇家族，结怨的家族
parental interference [pəˈrentl ˌɪntəˈfɪərəns] 父母干涉
intensify [ɪnˈtensɪfaɪ] vt./vi. 加剧，增强，强化
attribute (to) [əˈtrɪbjuːt] vt. 把…归因于，归咎于
reactance [riˈæktəns] n. 逆反心理（因自由受威胁而产生的抗拒心理）  
motivational state [ˌməʊtɪˈveɪʃənl] 动机状态，激励状态
social network effect 社交网络效应（指亲友认可对恋爱关系成功的影响）
defiant reactant [dɪˈfaɪənt riˈæktənt] 叛逆型逆反者（倾向于与人对着干的人）  
independent reactant [ˌɪndɪˈpendənt riˈæktənt] 独立型逆反者（依自身判断行事的人）  
get in the way of 妨碍，阻碍
be attached to [əˈtætʃt] 依恋，依附，爱慕
unattainable [ˌʌnəˈteɪnəbl] adj. 无法得到的，不可企及的
withhold [wɪðˈhəʊld] vt. 拒绝给予，保留，抑制（情感或反应等）
dopamine rush [ˈdəʊpəmiːn rʌʃ] 多巴胺冲击，多巴胺激增
get hooked on [hʊkt] 迷上，对…上瘾

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